HAPPY FONDLING!

This was my Facebook status on January 12, 2012 days ago (from date of post).  A week later, I found myself sitting in the Hill Breast Center waiting to have a diagnostic mammogram. In an instant, I went from being confident in my “fondling” to being concerned about my future and my family.  
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I had gone to my OB/GYN for my annual checkup.  I brought Aust and King with me since they were out of school for the Martin Luther King holiday.  My plan was to go in, get my usual "clean bill of health," and then spend the rest of the day with the kids at the mall.

The nurse called my name, I went to the back, pulled out my lucky socks (for comfort) and assumed the position.  (Ladies, you know the routine.) One exam down – one to go.  Phew!  That's literally my thought process every time.  Even though I appear calm, it takes everything in me to not rip the vinyl off the exam table.  :-)

The breast exam followed.  A breeze, I was sure.  The nurse started with the left first then the right - then left again...then right again..then left..then right.  I immediately got the feeling something wasn’t right.  She asked me a few questions and then made the decision to set up an appointment for a diagnostic mammogram.  I don’t remember what she asked me.  My brain, which already had me off the table and getting dressed under my “clean bill of health plan," was busy rewinding to figure out what had just happened.

I do remember her saying that she wasn’t sure if she was feeling dense tissue or a lump.  Without a reference point – my mammogram I was supposed to have gotten at age 35 – she couldn’t be sure.   She told me I could get dressed, and then she darted out the door. 

I should’ve been happy to get off the exam table, but instead, I lay there for a few minutes more.  I had to wrap my head around the fact that this was anything but routine.  I was going to have a diagnostic mammogram and not just the routine mammogram I’ve been putting off for the last four years.

I must say that I panicked a little, but I knew I had to get it together before I walked out to see my children sitting in the waiting room.  I was a little concerned, but I composed myself for the sake of the kids. In the back of my mind, though, I knew that God had it under control.  He’s my Healer and my Savior.  I could walk out into the waiting room knowing that I was going to be victorious no matter the results.

Just a little sidebar funny:  I had to sit in the waiting room a few minutes until they gave me information on the referral.  I noticed Kingston was acting a little nervous.  He had had plenty of time to sit and observe his surroundings – a room full of pregnant women.

As soon as I sat down he asked, "Mom, what kind of things  did they test you for?”

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The Hill Breast Center

Beautiful and bold wall art at the entrance to the center

Two days later, I arrived at the Hill Breast Center dressed in the armor of God, and fully confident that no matter the outcome, I would come out on top. 

The facility was very inviting from the entrance.  I went through a very quick and organized registration before heading up to the 3^rd floor for my tests.  I was a little nervous, especially after the young lady put a wristband on my arm as if I was being admitted to the hospital. 
But when the elevator doors opened on the 3^rd floor, I was greeted with warm and inviting smiles from two very nice women at the front desk.  They instantly made me laugh with their jokes about mammograms and how bad they hurt. They tried to soften the blow a little after I told them it was my first time.  

“Oh, no, no!  It’s not that bad.  You’ll be just fine,” they said.  They were right.  It didn't hurt as bad as all the stories I've heard. There was a little discomfort for a couple of seconds, but that was it.

The ladies explained to me that because it was a diagnostic mammogram, I would get the result before I left.  For some reason that made me feel better.  There’s nothing like waiting days and weeks for possible bad news.  They also gave to me the rundown on the ultrasound.  I would only need it if the radiologist could not conclude anything from the mammogram pictures.

Me...pretty in pink in the waiting room...playing with my camera.

I’m pretty good about doing my self-breast exams.  I had never felt a lump, but I did question the denseness along the top part of my breasts.  I just figured it was the hardness of my chest due to ity-bittiness (I am a life-long member of the IBTC). :-)   While I was nervous about the unknown, I was still pretty confident that I wouldn’t need no stinking ultrasound. Yeah, right!

While the technician was rolling the wand over my right breast, I wondered what they had found on the mammogram pictures that warranted the ultrasound.   I must admit that my confidence meter started to have a meltdown.  I went back deep into my childhood to figure out what I had done to deserve a fight with breast cancer.  My family is more of the diabetes/hypertension variety.  Not cancer!  Why me? I was the good child.  Heck, I’m still the good child!  Never did anything wrong.  Why me??? 

Loved the pink water bottle!  Hey, what can I say! I'm easily amused!

I faintly heard the tech say she was going to get the doctor to talk to me.  My confidence meter was shot!  Another scenario played in my head.  “Maybe we’re catching  it early.  I’ll fight it and win!  I would lose my hair, but then I could go nature like Lon has been begging me to do for years.  I could do this!”

I was looking up at the ceiling thinking all of this nonsense when the doctor entered the room.  I tell you, it was like something out of the movies.  I had to blink to focus my eyes on him.  Between the white ceiling, the glare of the lights and his pristine white hair and coat; I thought I was seeing an angel.  He was the most beautiful doctor I had ever seen.  I thought for sure God had sent an angel to tell me the news. 

Turns out, he was an angel.  He told me the best news I had heard all day.  My breasts were perfectly fine.  He could not find any signs of cancer.  I thanked him and my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ!  I got dressed, put an air check on my “clean bill of health” and walked out of the room with a big smile on my face.

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The moral of the story:

First Coast New anchor,Jeannie Blaylock, doesn’t do Buddy Check 12 just for her health!  Oh, wait!  Yes, she does! OK, maybe not for ratings, then.  But she does it for my health and yours.  Your health is important.  You have a family to take care of and children to raise into these wonderful adults.  While you may not want to do self-breast exams for fear you might find something; you must do them because…you just might find something.  But the earlier you find the cancer, the better your chances are of surviving it.  

Before I posted my Facebook status that day, I was a little apprehensive about using the term “fondling.”  I didn’t want to take lightly something very serious.  If you do self-breast exams, then you know there’s actually a technique to it (click on the self-breast exam link below to see how it's done).  But being the silly-billy that I am, I had to give it a silly name. I’m proud to say I’m a fondler!  Everytime I fondle my breast, I’m helping to save my life. 

Self-breast exams helped me to go into the Hill Breast Center somewhat confident (minus the meltdown) that I hadn’t felt any change in my breast.  I am; however, thankful to the nurse at Faben OBGYN for making the decision to get it checked out.  Now I have double the confidence that my breasts are healthy.

Moms…and dads…please take the time to do your self-breast exams. It could save your life!

So again I say, HAPPY FONDLING!!!!

P.S. A special thanks to the ladies at the Hill Breast Center for the best breast experience ever!